Tuesday, June 26, 2007
Is Gluttony A Sin?
I am being accused of gluttony. You need to know what happened last weekend, point by point:
1. My humans went to Suffolk and abandoned me.
2. They arranged with Uncle Andrew to come and feed me my stinky goodness on Saturday night and Sunday morning.
3. My mum remembered the time that Uncle Andrew forgot to feed me, so, just in case, she made sure my bowl of dry food and my water bowl were well-filled.
4. Because of the evil d-i-e-t I am perpetually on, I am only supposed to have enough dry food every day to cover the bottom of the bowl. (I know, I know, it's cruel).
5. But, as stated in point number 3, this time my mum filled the bowl right up.
6. When the bowl is filled right up, the amount of dry food in it is the amount I would normally get over about 6 days.
7. I ate the entire bowlful on Saturday. Well, it was there! I couldn't help myself! I am not the kind of cat who knows when to stop where food is concerned!
8. Then Uncle Andrew, by accident, left the rest of the bag within my reach instead of putting it back in the cupboard.
9. I ate the rest of the bag before my humans came back on Sunday night.
10. My humans came back and could not believe that ALL the dry food was gone.
11. I lay around with a very fat tummy feeling very happy.
12. I pooped in my litter box four times as much as normal.
13. I asked my humans for more food because I was hungry again.
14. My mum says if I am not careful I will end up like those Super Fat Cats on the TV news who can't even walk and she is going to enforce the d-i-e-t rigidly.
15. I am sad about the d-i-e-t but I have happy memories about my weekend of gastronomic indulgence.
What do you think, my friends? Did I overdo it?
1. My humans went to Suffolk and abandoned me.
2. They arranged with Uncle Andrew to come and feed me my stinky goodness on Saturday night and Sunday morning.
3. My mum remembered the time that Uncle Andrew forgot to feed me, so, just in case, she made sure my bowl of dry food and my water bowl were well-filled.
4. Because of the evil d-i-e-t I am perpetually on, I am only supposed to have enough dry food every day to cover the bottom of the bowl. (I know, I know, it's cruel).
5. But, as stated in point number 3, this time my mum filled the bowl right up.
6. When the bowl is filled right up, the amount of dry food in it is the amount I would normally get over about 6 days.
7. I ate the entire bowlful on Saturday. Well, it was there! I couldn't help myself! I am not the kind of cat who knows when to stop where food is concerned!
8. Then Uncle Andrew, by accident, left the rest of the bag within my reach instead of putting it back in the cupboard.
9. I ate the rest of the bag before my humans came back on Sunday night.
10. My humans came back and could not believe that ALL the dry food was gone.
11. I lay around with a very fat tummy feeling very happy.
12. I pooped in my litter box four times as much as normal.
13. I asked my humans for more food because I was hungry again.
14. My mum says if I am not careful I will end up like those Super Fat Cats on the TV news who can't even walk and she is going to enforce the d-i-e-t rigidly.
15. I am sad about the d-i-e-t but I have happy memories about my weekend of gastronomic indulgence.
What do you think, my friends? Did I overdo it?
Friday, June 22, 2007
Still Here
I can't believe my mum hasn't let me blog for over a week! She's just been coming home from school every day and hogging the computer all evening, writing those end-of-year reports. I've been suffering from severe neglect and hardly getting any fuss, except from my dad. My blogging friends probably think I've gone missing. The good news is, she has finally finished writing the reports! And she only has 4 weeks to go before the end of term and I can get lots of quality time with her in the summer holidays.
The bad news is that my humans are going away for the weekend (to Suffolk) so I will be even more neglected, even though Uncle Andrew is coming in to feed me and the humans are only away for one night.
I'm going to need a lot of treats to make me feel better about all this. Still, on Monday normal blogging should be resumed, and my mum has promised I can have lots of computer time to visit all my friends and find out what I've missed in the blogosphere!
Wednesday, June 13, 2007
Widebody Wednesday
Some time ago, Mitten the Smitten Kitten in New Zealand posted some pictures of him sleeping on the legs of his human, and he said it would be all right for me to borrow his picture to show you:
Well, when my mum saw that picture of Mitten she said, "Eric can do that too!" but then for ages she couldn't get a picture to prove it (because usually if I am sleeping on her legs she can't get up to get the camera!) But now there is photographic evidence so you can see that I can do this pose too! (by the way, my mum is the one wearing the brown socks and the wrinkly jeans, in case you were wondering).
And this one is me after the flashy camera thing woke me up:
Does anyone else sleep in this position?
Sunday, June 10, 2007
Same Old Same Old
In case you were wondering, I am not still hiding out in my catbed (thanks for revealing my pain to the blogosphere, Mandy!)
I haven't been able to get to the computer though because my mum is writing school reports. I've had a pretty boring weekend, done a bit of sunbathing, mewed at her to get off the computer, mewed for more attention - that sort of thing.
Looking back at my blog from June last year, I see I was having exactly the same problem with this report writing. Practically everything I said in this post still applies!
Still two weeks of report writing to go. But I will be posting on Wednesday - I have a great Widebody Wednesday post!
Monday, June 04, 2007
Monday Moaning
Mandy Squillion here again reporting. Fat Eric is sulking in his cat bed and refusing to blog. Do you want to know why?1. His humans went back to see the cute kittens again. The fluffy black one wrapped itself round the hand of Eric's mum and wanted her to play. Eric's dad didn't think the fluffy black one was that cute, but then he saw its sibling, the stripy silver tabby with the big blue eyes, and he went all gooey. They came home smelling of kitten and rabbiting on about how cute the kittens were. Eric was not happy about that.
2. His humans went out again and bought a new mowing monster for the back lawn. It makes a scary noise. Eric was not happy about that either.
3. Eric has been trying hard to be cute this weekend but he totally blew it yesterday by having some more "litterbox/dingleberry issues" and then deciding to jump on his humans in bed. It wasn't pretty, but let's just say it resulted in his mum having to wash the bedclothes, clean the carpet, wash the rear end of a struggling Eric and cut off a lot more floofy hair. Eric was so traumatised by all this that he hid for several hours afterwards.
4. Tonight he got pinned down again in a karate hold while all his front claws were clipped, and his struggles were in vain. He did get treats afterwards, but he still doesn't look very happy to me...
I have to go and cheer Eric up now and tell him to stop moaning. He should be like us Squillions, we are always smiling!
Friday, June 01, 2007
Floofy Friday: Trying To Be Cute
The good news is, the sun has finally come out here after days of rain.
The bad news is, I am feeling threatened. Yesterday my mum went out to get some charcoal filters for my litter box - shows she cares, I suppose. The problem is, she came back raving about these 9-week-old kittens she had seen, and how cute they were, and how there was this little black fluffy one that kept rubbing against her hand and licking her fingers and how cuuuuute it was...HEY! I do any licking of human fingers which needs doing around here, right? And if there's any being fluffy or cute which needs doing around here, I am perfectly capable of doing that too!
I do not need any little black fluffballs coming into my house licking my humans. No, thank you very much!
To make this clear, I have been excessively cute and loving towards my humans since yesterday - lots of lap-sitting, licking their faces, licking their hands, licking their hair, snuggling, purring, being cute...I have been working really hard! At this moment I am sitting on my mum who is sitting on the computer chair, and I am doing fluffy headbutts and a bit more hand-licking just to make sure she knows I am all the cute fluffy cat she needs.
Here is a picture to prove I am fluffy enough for any house:
And for anyone who wants a close-up of my cute little face:
P.S. I just noticed this is my 150th post! Hooray for me!
P.P.S. I am now paw-writing a sign to stick on the front door - it says NO KITTENS HERE!
P.P.P.S. Unfortunately the charcoal filters were out of stock, so she has to go back to the shop tomorrow. What if she meets the fluffy black kitten again? I need to get my dad to go instead...
